A Three Hour Tour

Kerala is an Indian state located on the southwest coast of the country. During the V-Four’s time in India we had heard amazing stories of this faraway land. The legends told of Ayurvedic massages, white sandy beaches, and all you can eat jumbo prawns. So we booked an overnight 14hr train ride to visit this land of promise and possibility. After our crash and burn bus experience, we decided we might be better suited for train travel. It turns out that just because you have a “Class 3A Sleeper Car Beds for Four” train ticket does not necessarily mean that there won’t be at minimum 3-4 Indians already sleeping under your covers. So we decided to call it a 50 person Indian style slumber party and managed to nuzzle our way into the bunks. On arrival in Kerala we first toured Varkala. This place is a beachy paradise with delicious cocktails and fresh fish and lots and lots and lots of t-shirts with a lifesize photo of Gandhi’s face on the front. (Don’t worry. We got one for each of you.) So we spent our day at the beach and even made an attempt at bodysurfing which sadly resulted in the sacrifice of my fave blue sunglasses to the Arabian Sea. These were quickly replaced with snazzy aviators during the most intense power shopping event of all time. During this event the V-four finally gained the upperhand in the Indian bargain sector by introducing boardwalk salesmen to the puppy dog protruding bottom lip. After a Keralan feast and four Diet Coke’s (these are a rarity in Indian culture and for some reason taste like liquid heaven) we bedded down at the Kerala Bamboo house. This place is the best bargain in town. For 20 bucks a night you get your own little bamboo hut complete with pink mosquito net and a roofless bathroom with jungle painted walls. It is quite an experience to look up from your bathroom to see palm trees swaying, the occasional bird flying overhead and the constant fear that shitdevil monkeys may have migrated west in the last week. After a breakfast of crepes we checked outta our huts and bused over to a town called Alleppey. It was in this town that we boarded our “Deluxe Three Hour Guided Tour of the Keralan Backwaters…complete with tasty snacks and cool beverages…all aboard an elegant wicker cruiseliner” Ok. No no no no no. That brochure is a bold face liar and we know it. The truth is that the Vellore Four were sent on a never ending Eufaula Lake float trip with a non verbal teenage boy who, when asked if it was snack time, pulled over to the side of a canal to an establishment I would describe as “Starbucks of India Village”. This joint is run by this lady who’s making chai and onion donuts in her hut kitchen and then these two jokesters that basically just stand around and eat all the donuts. (that’s them waving at the door of the “Starbucks.”) We bonded with the locals and proceeded to experience longest float trip ever. And I do have to say that the Backwaters are actually very gorgeous and a lot like India’s version of Venice with all these little canals and villages and you should definitely go there next time you’re in India. We washed off the backwaters at our hotel which I have to give a little shout out to for providing us with a large turning point in our travel plans for the remainder of India 2009. Liz happened upon 4 inch antennas, likely belonging to biggest ever cockroach peaking out from behind a mirror, and thus..Readers…The Vellore Four are no longer selecting hotels from the Budget section of the travel book and from now on will only take suggestions from items under the bolded heading “Luxury”.
So anyways we notified the authorities and got the heck outta dodge and spent Sunday in Kochin. This town is wonderful and has a forever long row of big Chinese fishing nets where some guys climb all over this unstable wooden structure to catch fish that they’ll sell you for super cheap and then grill it up with some rice on the side. So we ate that and then managed to squeeze in a tour of a basilica, a cathedral, a Jewish synagogue, and a little Indian antique shopping. We even had time for Chinese take out before boarding our overnight train towards the east where we battled the Indians in a cruel game of freeze out and don’t give the Americans bedding. But we bundled our bodies in mosquito nets, new scarves and head lamps and as soon as the frostbite lets up we’ll carry home the gold and deposit our love letter to India in the big red box pictured above.

When you’re slidin’ into home and you’re feelin’ something groan….

Diarrhea. Diarrhea. So the vomiting and stomach gurgling finally started and we’ve had one V-four member vomit in a flower bed during the walk to work and another puke it up on the balcony of our hotel banquet hall. (I will not disclose names of these persons) But we’re taking it like champs and nothing stopped us from beginning our rotation on the General Surgery service at the Christian Medical Center this week. We decided to bust out the scrubs we brought from home for this event. Turns out that was completely inappropriate as Indian scrub suits are required to be worn in size Gigantor only. So we changed and entered the OR. What’s happening back in that OR is just so hysterical I have to let you all in on it immediately. I preface this by saying that everyone in India is wearing flipflops. I mean I have not seen one set of closed toeds anywhere. And it turns out this trend extends into the OR with surgeons, techs, nurses, and patients donning the flipflop style. The other wonderful part about the OR is watching the Chairman of the Department of Surgery tap his toe and whistle to an album on continuous repeat of elevator music gone techo versions of “I’m on top of the world lookin down on creation…” In our spare time on surgery we have been visiting our favorite restaurant in town which is a family run Punjabi place. Punjabi means the food is all veg and completely awesome. They have a pretty thick cockroach infestation going on but their naan is so out of this world that the bugs have started to seem like an endearing quirk. This is a pic of the guy that runs the naan maker. (naan is basically an Indian breadstick) That’s all the blog time I’ve got tonight as the Vellore Four are about the catch a night train to Kerala. (a beachy paradise on the west coast where no one has the ria and the streets are made of gold).

Dancing Monkeys

This past weekend the V-four were brainstorming ideas for an exciting weekend getaway trip. We flipped to the section on Pondicherry and read the description of this former French colony with legendary pancakes, beaches, and a Ralph Lauren store. Immediately we knew this was sooo our kinda place. We shoved the essential swimsuit and flipflops into a communal backpack and headed to the bus station. The process of getting on a bus in India is one that deserves a little blog time. Ok the way this works is there is like 200,000 Indians, a herd of goats, 4 lost Americans, and of course your standard 25 lazy cows. (And just as a side note I’d like to say to the cows that Yes, We get it. You’re special. But just get outta the damn middle of the road. ) So anyhow all of these people and animals are all trying to ride on a bus to some town in India. This is complicated by the fact that none of the buses have numbers and everyone including the driver is somewhat unclear on where the bus is actually headed. 4 lost Americans have the added disadvantage of being lied to about where the bus is going so as to try to get 4 lost Americans to pay for a bus ride that 4 lost Americans think is taking them to pancakes and shopping. The other interesting part of public bus transport is that 200,000 Indians plus 4 lost Americans on a bus that holds 50, equals many Indians hanging on like Tarzan to bumper stickers. This also makes it extremely treacherous to exit the bus with your flipflop filled backpack at your stop. (see photo of me in the blue shirt trying to hurdle my body and the backpack through 200,000 Indians, and our new 5th lost American friend Robert trying to save the me/backpack combo) An added bonus for 4 lost Americans is getting to play in the obstacle course of buses going fullspeed toward oblivious Americans and leaping over the puke vomit of car sick Indians…only to be puke vomited all over at the end of the day. (really so sorry about your left foot Andrea)
But enough of the bus talk. So we finally did make it to “Pondi” and found the legends to be true. The pancakes were huge and fluffy and scrumptious and the mojitos were even better. The Vellore Four spent a lengthy amount of time with an Indian bartender explaining the delicate method for creating the ultimate Mojito. Our efforts only added to our extreme satisfaction with our Mother Teresa effect on India. Other humanitarian efforts include introducing fellow Indian bus travelers to pocket size hand sanitizer gel and GPS. Pondicherry highlights included visiting an ashram which is this big spiritual mecca which was started by “the Mother” who was this old woman who died back in the 70’s but they have a gorgeous shrine of flowers to her and they make a killing off of this gushy book which is basically “Chicken Soup for the Soul” by the Mother. We also took a beachwalk where we met a boy and his sidekick pet monkey that is supposed to dance for money but doesn’t actually move much and looks a bit on the sick rabies side of things to me. (We saw the boys old man boss in an alley later in the day. He was dressing the animal in pink doll clothes. I guess everybody knows a monkey is way better in a pink dress.) On the way home we made a side stop at Gingee which is a town that boasts two famous ruined forts (Rajagiri & Krishnagiri) . We trekked an hour to the base and a bagillion steps up to this thing and it was totally worth it. Somehow our group managed to pick up these two geriatric tour guides along the way and they did a slambang job of warding off adorable monkeys who morph into shitdevil monkeys before your eyes.
We eventually made it home safely after another 3 hour bus station adventure which resulted in more puking and the V-four ditching the buses for a private cab with A/C. All in all it was an outstanding trip and we learned lots about Indian weekend getaways. So next time we’re hiring a personal driver. And he’s taking us to a massage spa and lots and lots of mojitos.

Girl Child

I want to write about the women of India. It seems that the majority of women in this area are respected and treated well. But I have also seen that inequality and brutality are practiced under the guise of religious sanctity and and cultural requirements. When I was in the Vellore villages with a nurse, Greta, we visited one of the poorest families in town. A young girl was asleep on the floor with a 5 day old baby. She was groggy, slow to respond to our questions. And the infant was so dehydrated that his entire body seemed to be cracking and tenting when you pinched his skin. His fontanelle was sunk deep into his head. Greta explained that this girl was born with a very low intelligence and thus forced to marry a very poor potter. She had no money and also no knowledge on the care of an infant. I found this to be so disturbing. The other thing I have noticed in India are signs and statues that encourage women to cherish their female babies. The CHAD obstetric department will no longer provide ultrasounds because of the concern about pregnant mothers being forced or encouraged to abort female fetuses.
I've also heard of violence against women in other settings. In the community health clinic last week I saw a male toddler with a viral respiratory infection. His entire extended family rolled out for his doctor visit because of their concern for his health. The intern I was working with explained that if this was a female child she would not be brought into see a physician until she was much worse off. I was in the operating theatre yesterday and saw a woman who was to receive a split thickness skin graft for severe flame burns on the backs of her legs. Someone in the OR whispered to me that he has seen many horrible things like this come into the OR, but no one discusses the story of the cause "for good reason". Another story that Greta told us was of a girl from a large family of female children. Greta said that the girl received very little attention from her parents and when a boy cousin showed her attention she took it. She became pregnant with him and she was soon murdered for this.
As I said before I do believe that these stories are the minority and that most Indian women are respected. But inequality and violence against women does still exist and I thought it was important for me to write about so that I remember these stories and pray for change.

Coconut Spoons and House Calls

The Vellore Four are back from a weekend getaway in Pondicherry and I finally have internet to record all of the amazing events of the last 72 hours. So I’ll start with Thursday. This may have been my most favorite day of all of my favorite days ever in history. I know that’s bold. But it’s true and I’ll detail it for you now. The Vellore Four split up today to travel with two nurses into villages surrounding the town. Andrea and I went with Greta, a young nurse from the CHAD hospital in Vellore, and another woman who works as the public health liason (PHL) for the villages. We piled into a safari truck for a full day trip and on the way Greta explained the system that is in place for keeping tabs on the health of the villagers. Greta oversees 20 villages, which is around 20,000 people total. Today we were going to visit patients in their homes to perform antenatal and newborn exams, geriatric care, and also pay a visit to an elementary school associated with CHAD.
The landscape on our trek was some of the most beautiful I’ve ever experienced. The fields of rice and rich green palm trees was completely stunning and I just wish you could see it in person because my photos cannot do it justice.
We arrived at the first home and were instructed to remove our shoes at the door. While doing so we noticed these huge ornate chalk drawings in the dirt outside the front door. Greta explained that these are to welcome the gods into the home and that although the drawings are now done with chalk, they used to be drawn with rice powder which was important for feeding the ants. (I’ve always thought the majority of people were making efforts to rid the world of ants. Not so in India where there could be some rebirth ancestral tie thing going on.)
Inside the house we all sat “Indian style” in a circle on a mat draped over the dirt floor and placed a newborn baby in the center of the make shift exam table. After performing a newborn check up we enjoyed homemade hot chai tea in tiny tin cups with the new mother and baby. I asked Greta about the black mark on the forehead and left cheek of the baby and also if I could take a photo of the child. Greta informed me that the spots were to make the child ugly so that the gods would not kill the childs spirit and take her. She also explained that no photos are taken of children under 5 years due to a fear that the kid's spirit will be stolen by the gods. Uh, so that was scary and I decided against a baby Glamour Shot photo sitting. The rest of our morning was spent providing similar care to villagers in exchange for chickpea casseroles and onion quiches and the most generous and humble hospitality I’ve ever felt. Lunch was on a mat in the open center courtyard area of a patient’s 600 year old home . Andrea and I, being told to pack a lunch, pulled out our granola bars and Nalgenes and laid them on the mat. Soon, however we felt like fifth graders drooling over our classmates fruit rollups. The nurses had brought “Thali” meals which are basically rice with all of these wonderful curries and pickles and beans that you mix all together and eat with your hands. I think the nurses were tired of our staring and eventually forfeited some bites for us to sample.
In the afternoon we made a home visit to an elderly lady with hypertension. When asked if we could take a pic of her in front of her home with the best backyard view ever, she said yes and then proceeded to spend 20 minutes changing into her very best sari for the photo shoot. Such a beautiful woman. (see photo up top.) With the help of one of the villagers, I also developed a taste for the Indian coconut. The way this deal works is they cut the top off for you and you drink “coconut water” first. Then when you’re done they chop it in half for ya, knock off a little shell for a spoon for the coconut meat. And there you have it. The ultimate two in one beverage snack Lunchable. Greta noticed the shock on our faces at the novelty of this item and when we said we don’t have this at home she questioned, “But then how do you get your coconut water to drink then?” We laughed and explained the scarcity of coconut water in the US.
After tossing out the coconuts we visited the elementary school where I think I maybe said bye 55,000 times to the children who it turns out really like to wave and say bye over and over and over and over and over. We ended the day with a stop by the gypsy village and were serenaded by an elderly gypsy woman hollering a tune that sounded somewhat like an Elvis remake of “This little light of Mine.”
I think that about sums up the best day ever but get excited for the next posting. (also known as Weekend-o-Adventure and puking out bus windows.)

And we're back.

“Bring it India.” –Carly Miller
Today we did India. Like I mean the for real deal. We decided we would split our weeks at the Christian Medical College as follows… Week 1: Work at CHAD (a hospital with a labor room and medicine wards and also a program that sends nurses/docs out to 80 villages surrounding Vellore to provide medical care). Week 2: Surgery (scrubbing on ENT(e), Gen Surg(car), Gyn(liz), and Anesthesia (drea)) Week 3: working at a leprosy clinic and leprosy research facility. Week 4: Do the Taj Mahal. So today we were headed for CHAD. Aside from a minor misunderstanding with a local bus driver shuttling us to the opposite side of town from the community hospital where we were working, the rest of the day was complete awesomeness. Liz and Andrea joined the team in the peds wards for an Indian style pimp session by interns and attendings. They were rockstars and answered all questions correctly. (right girls?) And of course Carly, superstar surgeon, hung out on the medicine ward to change dressings for a patient with leprosy and she also managed to contract a few TB airborne particles and Typhoid germies in the meantime. I spent the morning in the newborn nursery/NICU where 8 new mothers in gorgeous sari’s cared for their ill children. The staff nurses basically run this joint and know about 10,000 times more than I do about just about everything. So I learned a lot and tried to help start an IV which I was rather unhelpful with. But I did get to talk with a mother, Malle, whose baby was admitted for lethargy and poor feeding. (she allowed me to take their photo.) After the Vellore Four realized how unhelpful we were in our various stations, we took a stroll of campus and had a run in with a herd of monkeys, swarm of bats (really thought that was a nighttime animal), and the biggest tree of all time ever. (see photo). But the best ever part of today was when we strolled deep into the heart of Vellore. We discovered flower markets and coconut stores, and stores that sell nothing but little plastic chairs. And I realized the craziest thing about India is that everybody seems to be selling something but I haven’t actually seen anybody buy anything. The store owners were super excited about having their pics taken and even handed out free herbs (ie. pit fresheners). I guess we are starting to seriously smell like curry because even the Indians are raising a stink about it. We ended the day by throwing utensils out the window, eating with our bare hands and sampling North Indian style cuisine at a family owned joint. I think we’re all really finally starting to embrace the culture. I say this simply because during our meal Andrea gazed across the booth and casually mentioned to Liz about the presence of a cockroach creature behind her right shoulder. Liz gave the insect a quick gaze, shrugged her shoulders and kept nibbling on her naan. We really are beginning to love you India.

Thank you India. We love you too.

"Today India kicked me in the ass." -Carly Miller
I woke up early this morning to get ready for our first day of work at the Christian Medical Center. I decided I'd go big for the first day and actually dry my hair for the first time since arriving in India. So I found my nifty little adapter, attached hair dryer plugger to adapter and proceeded to plug adapter/plugger combo into bathroom outlet. and BOOM. The electricity blows out for the entire fourth floor of the Darling Residency Hotel. Thank you India. We love you too.
After sorting out hotel explosions and other issues the Vellore Four proceeded the the CMC for our "orientation". Proceeding the CMC was a bit of an ordeal, however, as the streets in India have no names and no one in the town seems to know where to find a map or any of the cardinal directions for that matter. And thus, it took approximately 3 hours for the Vellore Four to find a building 5 kilometers from our hotel. Thank you India. After locating the medical school office (see attached totally gorgeous photo of this place) we were told by the director that we would need to walk down the street to the "photo studio" to obtain a passport photo. This deceivingly simple task took the Vellore four approximately 2 hours due to said "photo studio" owner being out to brunch until 5pm and said "photo studio" owner's twin brother with a similar business establishment down the block and extremely difficult to locate as it resides upstairs above the "Freshest Chicken" stand. (which was a little too fresh for my taste...see attached pic). So anyhow I won't bore you with anymore details but lets just say in general it was a day of the run arounds which ended with the foursome trying to walk from the hospital to the historic Vellore Fort for a little end of the day field trip. After feeling lost and certain we were miles and miles from the tourist joint we grabbed an autorickshaw man to drive us. He assured us this would be a high priced ride as the fort was quite a long distance away. We jumped in, he drove 100 yards, turned left, and we realized we'd been fooled. There was the fort. And there went 50 rupees. Once again,Thank you India.
On a positive note, we have made a large breakthrough in communication lines with the Indians. The Vellore Four have had much confusion over the side to side head movement of the Indian people in response to any question posed to them. Our guide book, however has really cleared this up for us. It reads as follows: " It's also worth noting that the commonly used sideways wobble of the head doesn't necessarily mean 'no'. It can translate to : yes, maybe, or I have no idea." Yeah. Really cleared things up alot.
And so to India...yeah. We get it. You showed up big today. You brought your game. But it's not over. The Vellore Four will be back tomorrow. And we're bringing the curry. And its the really spicy kind.